adventures in firebird ownership - the oil filler cap

I did some work on the Firebird this weekend. This may conjure images of spanners and jacks, but it has mostly been relegated to housekeeping and interior design. One concern that has been ongoing is the mystery smoke - some unknown substance burning when I idle at stoplights. I was worried this was the clutch until I discovered the same thing happened when I put the car in neutral. More recently I began to suspect it is oil, because the oil level has been slowly dropping. Through great effort I replaced the PCV valve about two weeks ago, which seems to have mitigated the problem, but the smoke continues.

Last week I found the oil level had gotten all the way down to the add level, so I picked up a quart of 5W-30 with the intent of adding it over the weekend. After all, I did manage to locate the oil filler cap during my PCV adventure. So on a brisk fall Saturday morning I popped the hood and went to remove the filler cap to add my oil.

The cap spun idly in my hand.

This was of great concern to me, as I am still a maintenance neophyte. I fiddled some more with the cap, seeking to release whatever child safety lock I imagined lay beneath. I had no success and suspended my attempts.

One thing I did note was that the cap advises the reader to SEE OWNER'S MANUAL. I recently procured a fresh copy of the manual, as the copy that came with the car was exposed to a ruptured waterlogged road flare in the part of the car I refer to as the magic mystery murder box. In any case, the owner's manual went so far as to describe the grade of oil used and a schedule for changes. Undeterred, I sought out my third party repair manuals, which helpfully describe the process as "remove oil filler cap."

I made another attempt to remove oil filler cap. The cap spun idly in my hand.

At this point I turned to the internet for advice. Some light Googling suggested that the teeth of the cap may engage differently if the engine is hot than when it is cold. Not needing another excuse to drive the Firebird, I took it for a spin. After ten miles of enthusiastic driving warmed the car up, I gave the cap another go.

The cap spun idly in my hand. And then I got singed by hot gasses.

I now weighed my options. Was it worth getting an oil change just to add oil? Surely this situation will just occur again in the future. And was I going to admit defeat? Not just yet.

Some more thorough internet research turned up a thread between some Jeep owners complaining of stuck oil filler caps. One contributor described how he resorted to disassembling the cap by using a screwdriver to remove the top cover, and then a pair of pliers to unscrew the lower assembly. I wasn't sure about taking such a drastic measure, but the contributor claimed the two halves would snap back together with no problem.

Armed with this advice and the vigor of a last ditch effort, I set out to the car with screwdriver and pliers. The flathead found good leverage, and the cap easily gave way to reveal that

IT

WAS

NOT

A

CAP.

It was a plug. A rubber stopper. No teeth, no lower assembly. Just a plug.

I added the quart of 5W-30 to the Firebird.

This is the sort of thing that causes frustration for me. Had they mentioned this AT ALL, ANYWHERE I could have been spared over an hour of grief. All the documentation overlooks one simple fact at the beginning of the process. They can't assume I will know this ahead of time, or else I would have no need for manuals, right? And yet nobody states, "The cap is really a plug. Just pry it out." I had a similar experience with the PCV valve, which is a one-minute job for someone with the proper knowhow. I'm not a stupid man, I just haven't been exposed to this sort of tribal knowledge. Which bodes well for future adventures.